There is a love

That will feel safe enough to dance in.

I've fallen in love

with every color in the rainbow,

but I'm still learning

how to leave the storm

that taught me to fear the sky.

Maybe healing

isn't finding someone else.

Maybe healing isn't hearing the thunder and not heeding the warning 

 

Maybe it's finding myself.

I'm no indoor plant.

I wasn't made to survive

on measured light

and careful expectations.

 

I really don't think anyone was 

But we have been repotted in new bodies and asked to find nutrients 

 

I've been loved

by people who watered me every day

without ever asking

what I actually needed.

When my leaves curled,

they blamed my roots.

When I stopped blooming,

they called me difficult.

When they couldn't understand me,

they decided I was too much.

But not every plant dies

from neglect.

Some simply wither

from being loved the wrong way.

I don't need someone

who mistakes possession for care.

I need someone

who watches the weather with me,

who knows some days

love looks like rain,

and other days

it looks like giving me the sun.

 

It looks like knowing i need the whole garden to be happy 

The bleeding hearts reflect my yearning for it all

Have you ever seen a flower and knew you wanted to lick it?

 

and as someone whose heart

has never believed love belongs

to only one kind of soul,

I've learned

that identity is the garden.

But all i see is just the gate.

 

The person who is meant for me

won't ask me to become easier.

They'll understand

that wild things

aren't difficult

they're alive.

And if they never comes,

I'll still grow.

I'll climb fences,

split concrete,

reach toward every piece of light

I can find.

Because I was never meant

to be a decoration.

I was always meant

to become a forest.